So here I am. Months after writing the last post on this blog…about to pour a bit more of myself onto the internet. Just bear with me please. There will be more posts to come soon, that won’t be the plethora of angst you’re about to read.
I leave for University/College in less than 12 hours. Frankly, I’m pretty much terrified… Now, I’m excited to be starting a new part of my life. But that’s it, the whole *new* aspect of it. If you didn’t know this about me: I tend to like to be in control of things. (Which is probably a big reason why I love being an assistant.) This whole “college” thing is COMPLETELY new. Let me give you a little back story: I haven’t been to “regular school” in 2 1/2 years. For those years I was homeschooled. Which needless to say, I didn’t do the “normal” way either. So this whole structure of classes and homework and papers makes me very nervous.
Now, I know I’m an intelligent person. I started reading when I was very young. Read the first Potter book by myself when I was 7-8 yrs old. I learn things quickly, take tests well, and have some really good common sense. But this idea: college and going off on my own into the world, down right terrifies me. I just… don’t want to fail and disappoint my family and friends that are rooting for me.
That’s it…I’m afraid of Failure. And here’s hoping that I won’t fail.
And here’s to the many unknown adventures to come.
Wish me luck?
{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
I can totally relate to what you’re feeling. I was home schooled from 6th Grade through 12th, though I did do dual enrollment at a community college for the last two years of high school. But, I was very ready to leave the nest. The college I left to go to was six hours away from home, and the nervousness hit me as it got closer to the day I was to leave. I remember shedding tears on the car ride. What I didn’t know that day though was that I was about to experience what have probably been the greatest three years of my life where I would meet some of the most wonderful people in the world. You’re gonna have a blast!
Don’t worry – just walk in and act like you own the place. People will believe you.
Holly was home-schooled too, and when she came to college it was weird for her. But, pretty soon it’s just your same old same old.
Take it from someone who’s been out for 3 years, though. Have as much fun as you can now, and focus on getting the most out of it. Don’t work so hard you forget to have fun – if I had taken my own advice, college would have been 1000 times as more fun.
I know you. You’ll be fine.
Lizzie,
1. Please refer to JKR’s commencement speech at Harvard for some wonderful advice about “failure”.
2. I felt the exact same way when going off to school. College is scary for everyone, because if you’ve chosen a good school for yourself you are choosing somewhere that will challenge you both intellectually and personally and force you to grow. The important bit to remember when things get challenging is just what you already said about yourself: you are intelligent, well-organized, and understand the importance of perseverance. These qualities will enable you to thrive at college and beyond. Also, if you just remember that everyone else is just as nervous as you are about starting school, it helps to put things into perspective.
Good luck. I know you’ll do well.
Hey Lizzie,
I don’t like change either, so I can relate to your apprehension. I must say though – I had no idea of your age until now. I knew you were younger than me, but I had you pegged at probably 7-10 years older than you were, for brilliance & wisdom alone!
I did my failing right out of the gate. Never made it to college, and didn’t even graduate high school. And of course I still ended up where I am now.
You’ll do awesome! And with your smile and your personality, you’ll be surrounded by great friends and positive experiences in no time at all
Great to see you in Nashville yesterday!
-Lynn
You’re going to have so much fun. I was homeschooled from K-12 and college/homework/classes with other people were all completely new to me, but I loved it. Stretch yourself and reach out to people… they all need new friends just as much as you do!
Good luck!!
Lizzie..
Try everything.. that’s what I did and made college so much fun. If there is a lecture that may sound boring, try it – you never know who you will meet or what you might hear (and it may not be that boring). If you don’t agree with a prof, research and defend.. Prof’s actually like when it (and they tend to remember you for it). Go to the concerts that are on campus.. go to speaking engagements.. go to games.. take an odd class that doesn’t fit into your major.. try everything at least once, because college is the first and probably last place try it. You never know, you may have your mind set on one thing, and by just doing something (that may even seem out of the norm) you may just end up finding something else.
Trust me, you’re going to do just fine at this whole college thing. Honestly, if I can survive it, so can you. Besides, you seem to be far more prepared than I was – and if you’re this far ahead in the game now – imagine where you’ll be after school.
Susie and I are both behind you, and pushing hard.